Do People Generally Prefer Longer Sex?

When it comes to sex, whats normal is awhole lotless important than what feels good. Normal has almost no bearing in the bedroom. If you come from doing 27 jumping jacks, amazing! Do 27 jumping jacks! The best way to have sex is to do what you and your partner enjoy! In fact, in terms of premature ejaculation, the actual medical diagnosis requires that the person bebotheredby how long sexJaipur Escort Serviceis lasting for them. (That might include being bothered if their partner is bothered). Urologists who study this agree that if you and your partner are happy with how long sex is lasting no matter how long that is then you dont have a problem! Although, if youre curious, the best study we have placed the average erection during sex lasting 5.4 minutes, and in another study, it took heterosexual women in long-term relationships an average of 13.41 minutes to orgasm foreplay is your friend! But all of this is rather irrelevantto you.

I completely understand your inclination to try to figure out what other people are doing, especially because you two are each others only partners. If theres one thing humans love to do, its comparing ourselves to others sexually. And at least 99 times out of 100, we lack the information, so we make up a narrative. We convince ourselves that mythical people out there are having better, hotter, easier, spicier, and more sex all the time without putting in any effort. We fill in the gaps in our knowledge about other peoples sex lives with completely imagined scenarios, usually based on our insecurities. I want to make it so clear that you are not alone in doing this. Pretty much all of us have, at one time or another, worried that were somehow not doing sex correctly, and rarely is it based on any feedback were getting from a partner. Its so much more often based on vague ideas we have about other people. It turns out, that staying in our sex lanes is rather difficult.

Sincerely, you can take this worry off your plate. Free yourself to think about Harry Styles and baby elephants not knowing how to use their trunks well and how to get the stain out of your favourite sweatshirt. That said, there is one overarching theme to your letter, and while I dont ever want to tell someone that they should worry about something, you might want to think about it a bit. It seems like you and your partner arent doing a whole lot of communicating when it comes to sex. Maybe other areas of your life, too, but specifically it seems that you arent talking about sex, otherwise you would have an answer to your question already because you would have asked your husband Hey, do you want sex to last longer? or even just How is our sex life for you? Is there anything you would change?

You also say you think your husband is satisfied with your sex life, which means you two arent talking about that, which is very fundamental. Additionally, it seems like you dont trust that he would bring this up if hewereunsatisfied, which suggests to me that youre both used to not talking about sex. This is all OK! Its totally fine to not immediately and naturally fall into really great sex conversations! Especially with your first partner, even if he is a long-term partner and your spouse and the father of your children. Most of us are pretty mediocre at talking about sex for a lot of reasons. It can be awkward, it can be emotional, it takes a lot of practice to get comfortable discussing, and weve been toldnotto talk about it for most of our lives. Youve probably talked about cucumbers with more people than youve talked about sex! You both probably havent had much opportunity to get good at chatting about sex with one another. And certainly, your relationship can stay that way and survive. Many, many, many couples dont communicate about sex and have long, loving relationships. But I strongly urge you to strive for more!

You are only having sex with one person one! You guys get to share this really beautiful, cool, hot, intimate thing withonlyeach other. Its a little secret club. There are a lot of parts of a romantic relationship that are not exclusive to your partner. Yes, you joke with them, but you also joke with friends. Yes, you share child care duties with them, but you also do with your childs preschool teacher. Yes, you do family traditions with them, but you also do that with your children. But sex? Thats just you two! (Obviously, not all couples are monogamous, but from your letter, you seem to be). It seems, to me, like it would be very lovely and hot to get to talk about that. It doesnt have to be deep, awkward conversations, although I super strongly recommend pushing through the discomfort and having those, too. It can just be you saying something like, I find it so hot when you X or Would you ever be into me doing Y? That counts as communication!

And when it comes to your specific question, there are multiple ways you can figure out if your husband wants sex to last longer without it seeming like youre suggesting that he comes too quickly. You can say, as sex is beginning, Do you want me to slow down? or you can pose the question Hot and fast or slow and romantic tonight? Or you can ask him outright, out of the bedroom (or wherever youre having your spicy moments), Do you ever want us to slow down and have longer sex, or are you happy with the speed were going? That makes it clear that you understand that youre both setting the pace, rather than it being all about his orgasm,which it isnt, by the way!Im hoping that when you say your orgasms are separate you dont mean that you go have them alone without him. I dont think orgasms are the point of sex they should all be pleasurable. But I hope youre both as invested in you feeling good as you are in him feeling good.

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