Kinks vs. fetishes.
The term derives from the idea of a kink (cf. a bend) in ones sexual behaviour, to contrast such behaviour with straight or vanilla sexual mores and proclivities.
While fetishes usually focus on one object or one body part, i.e. latex, leather or feet, a fetish can be an action, a sexual act, a behavior, or even a dynamic between partners. Fetishes are often all-encompassing and are the focal point of a persons erotic life. For example, a person with a foot fetish would not derive additional pleasure from simply touching, licking, or seeing feet during sex; instead, they may only want to interact sexually with their feet to the exclusion of anything else.
Whether you have a sexual fetish, a fetish, some sexual interest, or just prefer vanilla sex, the key element is the same: enjoyment. There really is no right or wrong way to have sex as long as everything is what the heart desires. Especially because sexual interests vary from person to person, and there is a lot to learn and explore.
So, for your pleasure, heres a list of the most common kinks, fetishes and sexual terms for your familiarity.
- Age Play
The kink is a specific type of role-playing where one or two consenting adults play a role or age other than their own, Moore says. If youve ever been turned on by being called a baby, little boy/girl, mommy, or daddy in bed, this could be your kink. Age play can range from using a different name to dressing up as a baby; it all depends on what you feel comfortable and excited about.
2. Ropes and Bondage
Rope bondage is when one partner (usually the superior or dominant partner) restrains the other partner (usually the submissive) with rope.Some people like to be tied up, while others like to tie up their partners, and some like both. Bondage uses wacky sex toys likehandcuffs orrope, but it can also be as tame as using a scarf, tie or T-shirt to restrain your partners wrists while you have sex.It is a form of Japanese rope bondage that involves intricate knots and patterns and is considered an art form.
3. Cuckolding
Cuckolding is a form of the aforementioned erotic humiliation of watching your partner have sex with someone else. Yes, thats where the term cuckold comes from. A cuckold is a submissive who identifies as a male and gets turned on when his partner has sex with someone else, usually a more traditionally masculine person. Sometimes the ducks will watch from the corner of the room. Sometimes the duck is verbally abused for having a smaller penis when their partner has sex with someone else, and sometimes the duck is forced to stay at home, satisfied by the knowledge that their partner is out having sex with someone bigger and stronger than them.
4. Dominant and submissive
Domination is one half of BDSM, the D.S. part (dominance and submission), and is all about the exchange of power between consenting partners. In this particular fetish, the dominant partner derives sexual pleasure from control. The submissive partner enjoys being dominated and is the one who voluntarily gets tied up, slapped or humiliated. You dont have to sign any kind of contract all you need is the enthusiastic consent of all parties involved.
5. Exhibitionism
Exhibitionism is the act of exposing in a public or semi-public context ones intimate parts for example, the breasts, genitals or buttocks. The practice may arise from a desire or compulsion to expose themselves in such a manner to groups of friends or acquaintances, or to strangers for their amusement or sexual satisfaction, or to shock the bystander.[1] Exposing oneself only to an intimate partner is normally not regarded as exhibitionism. In law, the act of exhibitionism may be called indecent exposure, exposing ones person, or other expressions.
6. Foot Fetishism
Foot fetish is one of the most common fetishes, especially for heterosexual men. People with foot fetishes are literally turned on by feet thinking about them, touching them, seeing them and are likely to be turned on by all feet. They often want to engage in foot worship, which means treating their partners feet like a sacred object: kissing, caressing and massaging it. So even if you dont have a foot fetish, having a partner with a foot fetish can be very enjoyable, because it means there may be plenty of foot massages waiting for you. However, like all fetishes, foot fetishes exist on a spectrum. Humiliation can also play an important role in a foot fetish. A fetishist may want to shove their feet in their face and mouth, or have their partner walk all over them and brag about how dirty their feet are and how pathetic it is that the fetishist enjoys such activities. Other foot fetish activities include giving a pedicure and sniffing said feet or shoes.
7. Gags
Having a gag fetish may mean that you get off on wearing or having your partner wear a certain type of gag. Ball gags or silicone gags are common toys. Carey says, this fetish is for people who like the feeling of being manipulated and not being able to talk. gags come in wildly different forms for both men and women, such asflower-shaped, dildo, and double ring-shaped. When exploring this quirk, it is important that the gagged person can still communicate. If they need to stop playing, they can hold a small bell in their hand, or throw a ball to get attention.
8. Erotic humiliation
Like most kinks, erotic shaming exists on a spectrum. It can refer to a dominant person voluntarily calling their submissive partner names such as slut during sex. It can also be as extreme as someone voluntarily being forced to watch their partner have sex with someone else in front of them.
9. Impact Play
Impact play is usually performed by a dominant on a submissive and refers to hitting or whipping a partners body. Spanking is a common form of impact play, and others prefer to use toys such ascrops, paddles or whips. To keep impact play safe and comfortable, most partners will decide on a safe word to stop at any time, agree to spank only fat areas (such as the buttocks or thighs) to reduce pain, agree to communicate any discomfort or unwanted pain, and communicate on the spot to make sure the submissive is okay with the pain level.
10. Wax Play
Candlelight is fantastic for atmospheric lighting, but you can also use melted wax for painful sexual pleasure. Of course, playing with fire (and wax) can be dangerous, so but we are here to support you. There are candles that exist to burn at the perfect temperature for your body, so you dont have to worry about accidental burns. Massage candles also exist. These candles have pleasant scents such as bourbon or dark vanilla. As the candle burns, the wax turns into massage oil. Enjoy.
11. Voyeurism
Voyeurism is getting sexually aroused while watching another person naked or engaging in sexual acts, says Jill McDevitt, PhD, CalExotics sexologist. While this pleasure is most commonly associated with watching others, the fetish may also include hearing others engage in sexual acts or even being told about others sexual experiences.
12. Sadism and masochism
Masochism is deriving pleasure from the high sensation most often referred to as pain, be that physical or emotional, Ortmann says.So if you enjoy being spanked, humiliated or spat on, youre probably a masochist. The other side of masochism is sadism (named after an 18th century French aristocrat), in which someone derives pleasure from inflicting pain of a physical or emotional nature.
13. Nylons
Hand in hand with foot fetish, nylon fetish is you guessed it someone who needs nylons to feel sexually aroused. This may mean that you like the way they look and feel, or that you like to touch someone elses legs in nylons (or like to wear them yourself). Like most fetishes, if its something you dont need but kind of like, it could be a fetish. Either way, get yourself some stockings and get to playing.
14. Objectification
Object sex also known as fetishism refers to a sexual relationship (or attraction) with inanimate objects. The media often portrays object sex as geeky and weird, falling in love with any inanimate object, which could be something like Brooklyn Bridge, a boat, or their couch. In sexual behavior, this can manifest as lingerie, feet andsex toys, so if youve ever fantasized about your vibrator, welcome to the world of fetishism. In fact, in an era of rapidly advancing sex doll technology, we may soon be somewhat engaged in objectifying sex. This perspective is crucial because it helps us understand and empathize with those who do have feelings for more out there objects, because affectionate shaming sucks.
15. Pregnancy Fetish
As the name implies, a pregnancy fetish is a strong sexual attraction to some or all aspects of pregnancy. For some, it may be a round belly, while for others it may be breastfeeding whether its the actual act of breastfeeding or the milk itself Adams explains.
16. Breath Play
Well, breath play is the BDSM practice of limiting your breathing during sexual activity, but its not exactly safe (for obvious reasons). A healthier and better option is to hold your breath. Not only do you get to experience breathing play, but you have complete control over how long you choose to or not to breathe. The excitement of the action, combined with the excitement of the power exchange, is a great alternative.
17. Roleplay
Role-playing is one of the most common sexual fetishes and involves playing a role outside of your everyday life, usually as part of a sex scene. This can include changing into a uniform, pretending to be your partners personal doctor, teacher or boss, channeling your favorite TV character, or even creating a full, character-filled scene.
18. BDSM
BDSMis a variety of often erotic practices or roleplaying activities involving different aspects of the kink community. B and D means bondage and discipline, D and S means dominance and submission, and S and M means sadism and masochism. All BDSM involves a consensual exchange of power, which means that the submissive partner agrees to allow the dominant force to take control through various scenarios.
19. Nipple play
Nipple play generally refers to certain people who have very sensitive nipples that they enjoy being played with, or are attracted to their partners nipples. In general, people who find themselves attracted to their breasts may find that they have nipple quirks. Tweak, lick and bite your partners nipples or invite them to do this to your nipples in order to find out if this is your fetish. The nipple toys that are common in nipple play have been very broad,nipple clampsand suction are great options and work for both men and women.
20. Dirty Talk
Dirty talk is exactly what it sounds like: the use of suggestive or explicit language during sex to heighten sensation and arousal. If youre generally verbose and like to use language during sex to feel powerful, this may be your fetish. Youll know if its your fetish if you orgasm faster when you talk or are talked to, Zrenchik says.
21. Quirofilia
A particular fetish for hands is called hand addiction (quirofilia), and it can manifest itself in an attraction to fingers, a great manicure, or just some smoking hot hands. Hands are sexy. They are used for a myriad of sexy things, such as the underrated masturbation, shiatsu, and back massages. While fetishists can definitely use masturbation, fisting or fingering (direct creative pleasure with the hands), some fetishists may get excited about doing mundane tasks with their hands, such as picking up groceries or doing housework.
22. Spectrophilia
For those who have a Spectrophilia report that they have sexual attraction, a relationship, or sexual contact with a ghost who comes to have a passionate love affair with them at night. The Phantom is a female ghost who, in folklore (or photophilic fantasy), visits the object of her desire at night for some fiery human-ghost love. The Phantom is of the male variety (also that band). While the actual existence of ghosts is debatable (and could be used in an excellent Halloween movie marathon), the sexual attraction reported by Spectrophiles are as real as any other fetish.
23. Urophilia
Urophilia is the fancy name for water sports, golden showers or, more directly, pissing games. With this twist, one finds that urination causes sexual arousal. You can do a lot with urine, although the most common way to enjoy pee games is to give or receive a golden shower. If you dont remember the unconfirmed dossier of reports claiming former President Donald Trump was involved in the act, a golden shower is having someone shower with their pee (and vice versa). If you want to give it a try, start with an actual shower.
24. Edge Play
Fringe play is any kind of activity that is further away and considered more dangerous, Dr. Powell said. What constitutes edge play is different for everyone. It can mean any activity that involves electrostimulation，blood or breaking the skin with some kind of whip, and there are some people who enjoy playing with knives and needles. For some people, golden showers may be a regular part of their daily routine, but for others, it counts as edge play. Anything involving intense physical pain is usually considered fringe play, but sometimes the most intense scenes in a kink involve only psychological fringe play, Dr. Powell said.
25. Switch
A switch is someone who can switches between dominant and submissive roles.
26. Scene or scene play
A scene is a term that refers to the time period during which kink play takes place. While you might call a night of sex simply a hookup, people within the kink community often refer to planned times with partners as scenes during which they engage in their shared kinky activities.
